You Deserve to Be Happy

Sometimes we think that we are supposed to go down a certain path; the one that many people tells us is the right one. And even though that path is a good choice it may not be the right one. Or sometimes we make plans for our life and they didn't work out as we had intended. Either way, we can feel stuck between what we think we should do and what we need to do. Even though the unknown can be scary, we need to jump into it, as if we were jumping into a cold pool.

As of recently, I learned that the job I thought would be the best for me was really the opposite. My anxiety had spiked greatly to the point where everyday was a challenge. Everyday, I was feeling sick to my stomach and was constantly dizzy. It felt like the world

was spinning endlessly and me along with it. I told myself to get over it, to just deal with it. Despite this, no matter how much I tried to keep my anxiety in control, it still seeped through. During lunch, I would take a 30 minute break to which I would sit in another room and look out the window. I felt trapped. Would I be stuck with a job that made me anxious everyday for the rest of my life? But I need experience! Then it hit me, experience for what? Did I plan on having a 9am-5pm office job for the rest of my life? Was this the path I still wanted to go down?

One night, I talked to my therapist and she told me something I would not soon forget. "Trinity, you deserve to be happy." She said that I did all that I could do to improve my circumstances at this job and if I were to continue working there it would only make matters immensely worse. She reccommended to me that I quit as soon as I could and to explore different areas of work. Specifically, work that would both aide me with my mental health and make me happy.

I'm not the kind of woman that likes to quit. In fact, my goals have always been centered around making other people feel better; and quitting for me felt like the opposite of that. I wanted to be the hero that swoops in and saves the day. However, in this instance I needed to save myself. I realized that I'm just as important and I really need to allow myself to be happy. My goals are important and I'm the only one standing in my way. Thus, I decided to quit my job and to explore my options. Due to this, I feel so much better with my newfound freedom. I have been continually working on my anxiety as well as seeking the right career direction for myself. It has been wonderful to know that I have the well-needed emotional support of amazing family and friends during this time.

The point of this story is to let you know that you deserve to be happy. Sometimes, this means going into the unknown or making adjustments to your lifestyle. Life is too short to spend in misery. We need to love ourselves enough to free ourselves. Now, I'm not saying that you should quit your job and do nothing. What I'm saying is that if you are in a job or a college major that isn't right for you, you should switch your major and/or start looking for a job that would better suit you. My friends, it's okay to feel stuck, as I have felt. This just means that you understand what you don't want for your life and this very valuable information. Don't be afraid to go after what you really want in life. You got this!